Peter Dinklage Says He Was 'Self-Saboteur' in Relationships Before Meeting Wife Erica Schmidt

For Peter Dinklage, meeting his wife Erica Schmidt changed his approach to relationships.

Speaking with The New York Times about his new movie musical Cyrano, which was written by Schmidt, Dinklage, 52, admitted that he would often self-sabotage his relationships prior to meeting Schmidt, whom he wed in 2005.

"I was guilty of always falling for someone where it wasn't reciprocated because keeping it at a distance is more romantic than bringing it up close," Dinklage said. "You fall for people you know aren't going to return that, so it's even more tormented, and you're not interested in the people interested in you. That's how my brain worked because I was a self-saboteur when I was young."

He continued, "You get a bit older and you realize that has nothing to do with anything. But it's okay because in your 20s everybody should be a mess."

Dinklage added he used to feel "unworthy" in relationships, saying, "I was raised Irish Catholic, so I totally feel unworthy of everything."

"That's what hopefully this movie is speaking to, that unworthiness we all go through. When you meet somebody you love, they're suddenly so important and so powerful that of course your go-to is, 'I'm not worthy of this, because why would I be? This is so much bigger than me.'"

In Cyrano, Dinklage plays the titular character, who feels unworthy of love because of his physical appearance. Feeling hopeless in his unspoken love for Roxanne (Haley Bennett), he instead helps another man named Christian (Kelvin Harrison Jr.) woo Roxanne using his own words.

Dinklage explained how he let go of the self-sabotage, suggesting that it has to do with finding the right partner: "I think other people do that to you. If anybody's been lucky enough to experience love, it just grabs hold of you. You don't control how you feel, but you can choose what to do with it."

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The Game of Thrones star also recalled meeting Schmidt for the first time, describing it to the Times as something out of a "crazy, romantic movie."

"It was about 18 years ago now. We were all at a friend's house and someone said, 'They're walking the elephants through the Queens-Midtown Tunnel.' The circus was in town and it was snowing, and they were walking the elephants through Manhattan, a long line of them. It was like something out of a beautiful, fantastical, end-of-the-world, crazy, romantic movie," he recalled. "See? I always think about movies. So that's the night we met, the night the elephants walked through Manhattan."

Cyrano is in select theaters on Jan. 21, everywhere on Feb. 4.