Dating as a millennial can be downright exhausting. I spend my weeks juggling dating apps, waiting for people to text back, and going on a bunch of generally uninspiring dates. As if that wasn't enough, it seems like a new shitty millennial dating term enters the lexicon every day. It's just too much to keep up with.
But you know as well as I do that keeping track of these ridiculous terms is a necessary evil, so I've decided to write them down and share them with you. Scroll down for a not-so-quick and dirty guide to 32 Internet dating slang terms. While their mere existence can be annoying, I'll admit that some of these terms are more useful than others, especially in certain situations—so I've grouped them as such.
Benching: verb Putting someone on the back burner; continuing to date them in a low-effort way, because while you know you're not interested in them, you think they might have potential. I think John might be a dud, but I'm not positive. I think I'll bench him so I can keep him around while leaving my options open.
Breadcrumbing: verb Sending flirtatious but noncommittal text messages to potential mates every now and then to keep them interested without exerting much effort. Guys, I just realized why Peter texts me all the time but never takes me on dates. He's breadcrumbing me.
Catfish: noun A person who pretends to be someone else online, often to lure in romantic prospects. verb To pretend to be someone else online, often to lure in romantic prospects. "Did you hear that Alison got catfished last month?" "Yeah, ugh, catfish are the worst."
Cushioning: verb Flirting with several people despite being in a committed relationship, so someone's there to cushion your fall if things go downhill. Lily, stop texting her! She clearly loves her girlfriend and is cushioning you in case things go awry!
Ghosting: verb Effectively disappearing off the face of the planet (without literally doing so). We had a great date, and then I never heard from him again—he totally ghosted me.
Haunting: verb Ghosting someone and then popping up to follow them on social media, like their posts, and/or watch their stories fairly frequently. "I don't understand why Millie keeps liking my tweets and Instagrams after ghosting me. It's like she's taunting me!" "Nah, she's *haunting* you."
Phubbing: verb To snub someone by paying more attention to your phone than to them. Please put away your phones! I can't stand people phubbing me.
Pulling a slow fade: noun The act of disappearing from a former romantic interest's life passively over a prolonged period of time. "You're still talking to that dude? I thought you realized you didn't like him." "Don't worry, I'm pulling a slow fade—easing my way out."
Stashing: verb Hiding a romantic interest from your friends and family, typically because you know they're only temporary. We've been dating for months, and he still hasn't introduced me to his family. I think he might be stashing me.
Submarining: verb Resurfacing in someone's life after ghosting them without explaining the cause for your disappearance. Luke is texting me again after not talking to me for six months—and he hasn't explained why. Ugh, he's submarining me.
Swerving: verb To avoid someone you're not interested in pursuing. He came up to me at the party, and I swerved him so hard.
Zombieing: verb Ghosting someone and then popping up every now and then to text them or like their posts on social media. "Mike just liked my Instagram! I think he's haunting me!" "No, he's probably just zombieing you. He's only haunting you if it happens a lot."
Catch and release: noun The (ongoing) act of hooking up with people without becoming emotionally or physically attached to them. We slept together Friday, but I don't know if I'll see him again. I'm more about the catch and release than the dating game.
Deep-liking: verb To go way, way back on someone's social media profile and like an old post. Oh sh*t! I just deep-liked something Jason posted in high school. Now he'll get a notification and know I was creeping on his old posts.
Dick sand: noun The emotional quicksand someone gets stuck in when infatuated with a guy. Haley hasn't been returning our texts, because she fell into Alex's dick sand.
Draking: verb Wallowing in sadness, typically because you miss your ex. Ugh, I called Sharon last night. I was Draking so hard.
Gatsbying: verb Posting something on social media with the hope of getting one person's attention. I Gatsby pretty much every day: I post Snapchats and Instagram stories of elaborate events and wait for Daisy to watch them.
Kittenfish: noun A person who looks more attractive in their pictures than they do in real life—so much so that you doubt they're even the same person. verb To appear more attractive in pictures than in real life. "I was so shocked when I showed up on the date—he looked way less attractive in person." "Whoa, was he a catfish?" "No, he was a kittenfish. I got kittenfished."
Monkeying: verb Bouncing from relationship to relationship without giving yourself some time to recuperate in between. Ashley's been in like, three relationships in the last four months. She's really monkeying it up.
R-bombing: verb To read someone's message and not respond to it. "Ugh, Hanna R-bombed me." "What? How can you tell?" "She has her read receipts on, and it says she read the message three hours ago."
Sliding into your DMs: verb To start a conversation with someone, usually in a not so platonic way, by sending them a direct message on social media. I think I'm gonna text Lisa. Nope, better idea: I'll slide into her DMs.
Thirsty: adjective Eager or desperate to get something, usually sex. He came up to me like, 10 different times last night. He was thirsty as hell.
Breezing: verb Being laid-back, straightforward, and open-minded at the beginning of a potential new relationship. *I'm so tired of playing mind games—I'm just ready to breeze someone. I want to be able to show interest, talk about how I'm feeling, and sleep with someone without worrying about what's next.
Tuning: verb Flirtatiously getting to know someone you like and who likes you back. I just started tuning Ally, and I'm really excited to get to know her better!
Penguin: noun The person you want to be with forever. verb, To find the person you want to be with forever. "Hey, Aubrey's pretty cute!" "Back off, she's found her penguin." "What?" "She and Matt are perfect for each other. They're penguining."
Shack pack: noun The overnight bag you carry when you know you're sleeping over at someone's house but you're not close enough to leave your stuff there yet. True pros keep a shack pack in their car at all times.
Situationship: noun A relationship that's not quite a romantic relationship but is definitely more than a platonic friendship. "I don't understand your relationship at all." "That's probably because it's not a relationship—it's a situationship. And to be honest, I don't totally understand it either."
Textlationship: noun A relationship that is built and exists solely through text messages. Paul and I text every day but have only been on one date. At this point, we're pretty much in a textlationship.
Cuffing season: noun The time of year when people who normally prefer to be single find themselves wanting to be "cuffed" or tied down in a serious relationship, typically during the fall and winter. I'm working hard to lock down a significant other right now—cuffing season is in full swing.
Drafting season: noun A period of time that precedes cuffing season, where single people evaluate their pool of potential mates and find someone to settle down with for the coming fall and winter months. "What are you doing this week?" "Um, it's drafting season—I'll be going on a date every night to try and figure out who to cuff."
Uncuffing season: noun The time of year when people end their relationships to play the field, typically in the spring and summer months. It's uncuffing season, so it's time to break up with your partners and hit the bars.
143: phrase "I love you." There is one letter in "I," four in "love," and three in "you." "143." "I love you too, babe."
I'll keep this list updated, so check back soon for even more Internet dating slang.
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